The Big Picture by Erin Kirkland

This is the time of year when I am desperate for something, anything that resembles spring besides a number on my calendar. It mocks me, this month of April, because every single calendar I view has a gorgeous tableau of spring's gleeful colors shouting out the entrance to warmer weather and sunshine.

I had a few free minutes the other day to take a short trail run, and while jogging along I began to inwardly whine about the lack of "green-ness" in my world once again. Tree branches stood out in stark contrast to the sky, and the dingy snow seemed like concrete beneath my feet. I think Tom talked about the colors of an Alaskan winter/early spring once in a sermon, and I've never forgotten the impact. Gray and Beige. Sky, ground, foliage; yep, that's what I thought I was seeing last Monday. Nothing but nothing.

But at the crest of a hill I stopped for a minute to stretch and something caught my eye. There, at the tippy-tip of a willow shrub, almost imperceptable, was indeed something green. I looked around at the rest of the shrub, and at its neighbors, and there they were, hundreds of them, misting ever so slightly a shade of green, and I had almost missed it because I was looking at the whole tree instead of just one branch, the place I should have been looking in the first place.

There is nothing wrong with looking at the Big Picture, the landscape of what we hope to see right now. But sometimes the closest, teeniest little detail is what gives us that larger view.

We would be remiss if we didn't pay attention, don't you think?

Give us a try at InsideOut and see if you don't see some little bit of detail that gives your life some color.

"I Am Here" by Erin Kirkland

For the last month I've been spending my Tuesday and Thursday afternoons at Northwood Elementary in Spenard, running. Asked by a friend to help her encourage, coach, and generally herd 85 1st-6th graders in and around the neighborhood in preparation for the Heart Run, I somewhat tentatively agreed and showed up, lock, stock and preschooler, for practice.

Somehow assigned to the "fast-running" group (mostly older kids), I quickly saw that most of them had little if any experience running, even for games like Tag, which we had to teach them during halfway stops. Nor did they like running in particular. They whined, they cried, they talked back as we slipped and slid around Conner's Bog and Lake Hood on our 3.75 mile runs. They said they would "never do this again" and fought every single suggestion for making their experience a little better along the way. They glared at me.

I decided to challenge a few of them by offering to pace them the entire way, telling them that if they stayed right next to me, they would be able to finish the course running, not walking. I promised. Running the exact same speed the whole 3+ miles, the kids who decided to trust me lasted about five minutes before racing ahead and then falling behind, huffing and puffing like a freight train, or stopping completely to swear at me and the world for the injustice of Running Club. I stayed at my pace; never slowing, never speeding up, and at one point I said "I'm staying right here, all you need to do is come with me and I promise I'll get you back."

Jogging along Wisconsin Avenue yesterday, it struck me that God does the same thing. He promises to be there, saying "I am here." I run ahead, thinking I know better, and fall back when I finally realize I cannot do it, embarrassed for not listening. Still He is there. I get angry, really angry, because I fail, and blame God for not helping me out. Still He is there. Quietly, simply, patiently.

How often do we forget? It took a pack of kids to show me.

Live the InsideOut Way This Summer

There's a ton of interesting and fun ways to contribute towards Trinity's missional attitude this summer. Yes, everyone, summer will appear one day, and when it does, we want to be ready with some new and different things.

First, Trinity has been offered the chance to run an Aid Station along the Mayor's Marathon route. Volunteers will hand out water, band-aids, wet sponges (yes, sponges) and provide access to first aid services. The marathon is set to take off at 7 a.m. on Saturday, June 19. Volunteers should be at least 10 (parents, you must be there too) and be able to stand and work for the full shift, which we will determine later. We even get to dress up and have music (hello, praise band, have you signed up yet?) Let Erin Kirkland know if you are interested and she'll add you to the list of super souls. e.kirkland0@gmail.com

Also, we have some opportunities in July to help with our amazingly cool, super-green Kids Fun Week, July 7-9 at Kincaid Park. Sessions will run from 12-4 p.m. and be an outside adventure for everyone who participates. We're going to Renew: Grow in Faith, Have Fun, and Change the World. Now how can we argue with that? Megan Holliday is going to be putting out some requests for supplies and expertise, so get ready!

Put our Summer Saturdays on your calendar now! May 15th is our Trinity Church-Wide Clean-Up day. Projects for everyone will be available. July 10 is our partner Saturday with Huffman Elementary School to make the park next to both places look more attractive. Kids projects/activities are available and we'll also have lunch.

God-Directed? by Melody Balcao, Worship Arts Director

Proverbs 20:24
"A man's steps are directed by the Lord. How then can anyone understand his own way?"

Isaiah 48:17
"This is what the Lord says- your Redeemer, the Holy One is Isreal: 'I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go.'"

Jeremiah 10:23
"I know, O Lord, that aman's life is not his own; it is not for man to direct his steps."

A musical director stands on the podium listening for balance; he sees and hears small variables in tone and pitch as his A-tuned ears seek out the sound of harmony, melody, and rhythm. For his vantage point and trained ear come unified motion, direction, and symphony. The audience looks on and listens with joy, living in the moment and enjoying the sound.

What brought this all together? How did it all play out? These are not the questions people ask as they sway to the music. Only the director knew the outcome and moved those with whom he was responsible to that place of togetherness.

As we seek to be missional, can we design our own pathway? Are we capable of seeing into the future? Who is it that directs our steps, leads us to a place of making a difference within the universe?

As I seek Christ's direction and guidance, I have peace in knowing that as director of my life, He's heard my melody and it's a song beyond my greatest dreams. Listen! How is He directing you?

Do You Have a 'Blind Side'?

Have you seen the movie? I finally caught up a friend's copy of "The Blind Side" this weekend. If you are one of the few who has not seen this Best-Actress-producing film (Sandra Bullock), this might be a good time; for a statement she makes in the last part of the movie made me think. And think a lot about my role as a 'good samaritan'.

Bullock playes well-to-do mother Liegh Anne Tuohy who finds samaritan-ship in the form of young Michael Oher, a big kid with a penchant for protective instincts and not so much for football, but that's another story. Tuohy brings this young man into her home, feeds, clothes, and nurtures him, and sees to it that his desire to attend college is fulfilled.

After a myriad of ups and downs and inbetween scenes during which we, as do her friends in the film, wonder if she is doing this for charity purposes or out of the goodness of her own heart, an incident occurs that forces Mrs. Tuohy to deeply question her role as a 'samaritan' acting as the hands and feet of Jesus.

"Am I a nice person?" she asks her husband after spending hours fretting over a lost child. "Was I really doing this for the right reason?"

Have you ever asked yourself that question? What was your answer?

Hear That? By Erin Kirkland

We've been talking about the "still small voice" a lot lately. Anyone else hear it? It's interesting; what was previously just that, a quiet little whisper in my ears, seems lately to be a little bit louder.

Maybe I need to listen a bit harder...

Start>

Attention Parents, Grandparents, Caregivers: Join us!

Our fabulous Wednesday Night Parents Group is starting a new book for our next discussion. We'll be reading "Parenting is Your Highest Calling and 8 Other Myths That Trap Us in Worry and Guilt" by Alaskan author Leslie Leyland Fields. The book is available on Amazon.com for around $11.

Anyone who cares for, lives with, or is interested in this book is welcome to join the group. We also enjoy a dinner together (and with our children, before they head off to their Club L.I.O activities) at 5:45 p.m. L.I.O, by the way, stands for "Living Inside Out" and is a great opportunity for kids to learn about the love of Jesus while parents are in the discussion group. We're done by 7:20 p.m.

If you have any questions about Trinity's Wednesday night activities, call the church office at 907-345-4823. We'd love to have more folks participate! Invite your friends, neighbors, and loved ones to this group.

A Home Group START>, by Erin Kirkland

Our home group began the study of "Start>Becoming a Good Samaritan" last week, and what has impressed us the most is the action item at the end of each chapter.

We gave some thought about how we could collectively act in a missional way for the community of Anchorage, and came up with a tiered approach to assist Safe Harbor Inn, located in Muldoon and where most of us also helped out on 30 Minute Service day.

Once a week, one family will drop off the ever-needed and always-welcome packages of toilet paper and coffee; once a month we'll all go and clean up the children's playroom. One of our criteria for serving is that our kids be involved and interactive in whatever project we select, and this seems to fit well.

It's nice to be not only studying together, but doing things together, too. Henri Nouwen, in reflecting upon his work with disabled individuals said "a slow job done together is better than a fast job done alone."

How true. Cleaning a playroom, providing some paper products and caffeine isn't much, but it's enough. And we're doing it together. A good Start>.

Easter Saturday...What Happened? - by Megan Holliday

This past Saturday I found myself thinking about what Saturday would have been like for the disciples on that first Easter weekend.

I tried to put myself in their shoes. I imagine they were pretty freaked out about all that had happened. I wonder if they were hiding. I wonder if they felt guilt or shame.

If I were there I would have felt pretty bad. Just 2 days before I would have promised Jesus I wouldn't run away. But they did, they all did. I would have felt so guilty and shameful. I may have tried to justify what I did. "If we had followed him they would have arrested us too! He would want us to be safe, don't you think?"

Then it hit me...I have said this! Sometimes I try to justify not having done something I know I was supposed to do (stop to help someone, say a kind word when it might be met with a negative response, etc.). I don't think God wants me to be hurt, but I think I limit him when I say, "Well, I can't go there or do that...it could be dangerous."

What if I began with, "God, today is yours. Use me as you see fit." If I seek his guidance, look to the Holy Spirit to tell me what to do and what to say, even if there's risk, I'll be leaving it up to him. I don't mean go out and be reckless because God won't let anything bad happen, I mean to be open to where God leads - even when it's hard.

I don’t know what the disciples said that Saturday. I do know that certain things about that weekend weren’t quite clear to them until later. If we trust God to lead us into places he is calling us, whatever might happen, who knows what will become clear later on!

More From Folks Ready to START>

Wonderful ideas keep coming in from those home groups participating in the latest study "Start>Becoming a Good Samaritan". Check this out...

The Henningsen's Home Group met on Thursday evening for session 2 of Start becomming a good Samaritan, Caring for the Sick. Tissues seemed to be a good thing to have on hand! During the "Now is the Time" discussion of how to put our faith into action, we felt called to focus on our Trinity family knowing that even here there may be folks without lots of resourses. We made a committment to examine the weekly prayer list, and get in touch with folks by sending cards first, to see if we could be of help. We will use one of our sessions to prepare meals to freeze and have on hand so we can offer that. It's not Africa, but we think there is a need :)

Samaritan to the 'Fallen'

By Lisa VanDoorne, homegroup leader. Such a wonderful example of how we can Start>

It was a beautiful, sunny, Saturday afternoon; the day before Easter. I was driving down a major hillside thoroughfare when I saw her. A woman walking a large dog stumbled and fell facedown into the dirt. She wasn’t moving. I pulled off the road and surveyed the situation in about four seconds. She was muddy, she had a large, mangy husky on a short leash. She wasn’t moving and then, suddenly, she was. She raised her head and at that moment I could see the blood. Her hair was matted and muddy and she was bleeding from a wound in her head. Call it the fact that our family has been steeped in Good Friday stories all week, but I could see Jesus in her face. Jesus on the cross; dirty, and bloody and alone.
I stepped out of the car, my scrambled brain forgetting to turn off the key or close the door, and hollered at her. I was scared of the dog, though I quickly found out I had no reason to be. Based on how dirty she was, I don’t think that was her first fall of the day. I slowly approached and tried asking how I could help and soon, (and fortunately) two other women, out enjoying a walk on a sunny day joined us. Between the three of us, we managed to learn her address, which was a short walk down a side street. One Samaritan ran ahead to the woman’s house while the other Samaritan and I picked the woman up from the side of the road.
She could not stand by herself. She would not let go of the dog who was apparently a source of support for her. She gripped my hand tightly. Her knuckles were bleeding. By the time we got her home my hands were muddy and my heart was pounding.
What happened that day to cause the woman to be found on the side of the road? Was she falling-down drunk? Was she in a diabetic shock? I don’t know how the story ends. A man met us outside the well-kept house and one of the Samaritans helped her in. I spent a few minutes out on the driveway chatting with the remaining helper and soon drove away, praying through my tears.
The previous evening, our homegroup followed the ‘Start>Becoming a Good Samaritan’ study focusing on Justice and Reconciliation. We are really enjoying the series and it opens up a good deal of spirited discussion. Talking later, Roland and I were thankful for the way God was moving in our group. One person shared their gratitude for the group and for the timing of it. Another shared his testimony in a simple and moving manner. It is a blessed comfort to meet with these people each week, but the truth of the matter is, we are called to take our faith out to the streets. God was moving even in the efforts of three strangers to walk a ‘fallen’ woman home. I am only grateful to have been a small part of it.

Good Friday is (Not) About Me

Many of you know that our family is missing one member in the form of our oldest son, 16, who lives at a residential school in Utah to help him manage his Autism Spectrum disorder. Two years absent, it's taken our family at least that long to reconfigure, regroup, and reevaluate our relationship with each other and with God.

My walk with God has been somewhat tenuous in the past; anger, hurt, and deep confusion predominated conversations with Him that usually looped around to "How could this happen to ME?" sorts of endings. Last year's Good Friday service was a powerful reminder of these things as I listened closely to a story I had heard at least a thousand times growing up. Geez, I thought to myself, God let his son die. His mother let her son die. Cruelly, painfully. It brought back a flood of negative memories and feelings contrary, as I now know, to the meaning behind the event. Like so many other people in the Fellowship Hall that night, I found myself weeping in a corner as I listened; but for me and the way my life had turned out so contrary to what I wanted and felt I deserved.

It's been a year of discovery and contemplation to look beyond myself and view the season of Easter in a different way. Tonight is another Good Friday service, and I understand more now, reaching out to its meaning, and how in a way it is about me. Me, and God, and You, and Everybody. I've found different conclusions this Good Friday that will lead to an absolutely different sort of celebration on Easter Sunday.

Who is your Good Friday about?

Change the World? How?

A post from Megan Holliday:

Our home group has been meeting and going through this new study for about 3 weeks now and I have been struggling with the "bigness" of it all. We talk about caring for the least, those who are sick, correcting injustice and I start to feel 2 things: helpless and tired. How can I save the world from injustice? I'm one person!

One of the most encouraging things to me from this study is the personal reflection times to do in between home group meetings. Part of these activities is to really think about how I can, as one person, do something. It doesn't have to be planning a trip to Africa to immunize kids (but it could be). It doesn't have to be starting a non-profit to serve underprivileged people (but it could be). For me it's looking around me to find the least. For me it's becoming aware of injustices and not letting them occur in front of me. For me it's being willing to step out of a comfort zone when I see a need.

My home group has encouraged me more than they know in the ways they have identified to be a Good Samaritan in their spheres of influence. They have decided to have a difficult conversation with a co-worker, make conversation with people they don't know, write to a prisoner on death row, try a little harder to get to know a person who's hard to get to know.

These aren't life-changing, earth-shaking, HUGE things to do, but they can be!

Do you feel helpless and tired when looking at the world's problems and your role to help correct them? Share your experience!